Stop...You're doing it to yourself.

Have you ever had something that needs to be done, but you dread doing it?   I mean just the thought was mental torture.  Well, if you had been with me when I came home from the gym one morning, you would have saw me walk in the bedroom to see my bed un-made.  This is a major thing for me.   I hate coming home to an unmade bed.  It creates a unwelcoming atmosphere and who wants to come home feeling unwelcomed?  Not me.

Now the rule in my house is, if you are the last person to get out of bed it's your responsibility to make it up.  Simple right?  Wrong!   My wife seemed to forget that little rule for a few days and I would find myself making the bed anyway.  One day after being completely exhausted from the gym I had come home to an unmade bed that she conveniently waited for me to get home for her to get out of—Not true, but you know how we think up the intent of others for them—Now that she is in the shower and I’m making the bed, you know I am giving her a few choice words in my head that need not be repeated on this post, and to add insult to injury I had to turn around and do the  dirty dishes as well.  I can't STAND dirty dishes in the sink!

Well as I am washing the dishing thinking about the task of having to make the bed, I find myself complaining about the bed and the dishes.  "I'm tired of having to make this bed every time I come home".  "I'm tired of washing these dishes every time I come home".  On and on I went raving as if she never does anything, until my brain couldn't take it anymore.  "Stop complaining" it said, stopping me in mid rant.  The moment I heard it there was this ounce of wisdom that gave me the reason why I needed to stop complain entirely.

This little voice inside me said "Charles every time you complain about something, you create a undesirable mindset toward doing that thing and that mindset is the reason why you are so aggravated with the task. And you’re the one who created it"!  Wow what a revelation! 

As I sat there pondering this shocking new insight I had to wonder, “Am I really doing this to myself?”  “Is all of the irritation and frustration with doing something really a direct result of my complaining about it?”   I sat there for what seemed like hours thinking about the different things I've had to do that I complained about. I couldn't help but see the evidence that it was my own doing.  What a wretched man I am! 

Think back to all the things you didn't want to do that needed to be done.  Wasn't it your unwillingness to do it that made it so hard, difficult and frustrating at that time?  I mean making up the bed wasn't going to kill me.  (It wouldn't have killed her either, but still!)  What makes something so mentally agonizing isn't what we are doing, but our unwillingness to do it that is created by our complaining. 


I'm going to CAA (Complain Addicts Anonymous) I now consider myself a RCA (Recovering Complain Addict) pray with me.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Next time you have something that needs to be done ask yourself.  Do I really want to make this hard on myself or can I choose to find some joy in knowing that I did it without complaining?